The Puzzle Game of Life

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The Puzzle Game of Life

Life is not a smooth way to walk. You may think that you are successful in life, well established and secured, so you can spend the rest of your life in peace; you are wrong. May be you are leading your life in your own way, difficulty comes from the out of blue. You will discover that everything is out of order; and whatever you used to think , in the new situation they are good for nothing.

My name is Rohan. I am 35 years old married man. I have a son, who is six years old chatterbox and a virtuous wife. I live with my parents under the same roof. I am loyal to my wife. But, at present I have a great question mark on my loyalty. This question mark has become as a challenge towards my peaceful life. I don’t know how to overcome it. I don’t know what I have to do. I love my wife very much. I don’t want to lose her and my son as well.

Sneha was my best friend from the primary school. Her father was a friend of my father. So, from very childhood we know each other. We are almost same aged. We went to same school, same college. I had a lot of friends in school, but she was special to me. Because she could feel my each and every emotions, mental states, way of thinking. She knew me better than I did. So, we were best friends even in that hard time of adolescence. She had not any girlish emotion like other girls. May be for those reason, our friendship was very strong. We used to play indoor games together, bunk college classes and go to the movie. Even when I practiced football or cricket with my school team, she used to wait for me and after the practice we returned home together.

I know you are thinking that we were a sweet pair of love-birds. Well ! Let me say; everybody around us thought that, even our parents were not exception. But they were wrong. We were just best friends. We had no feeling like love-birds to each other. Even, in my request, she had introduced a lot of her friends with me to chose a girl friend. Thus I met her and felt what is the meaning of “Love at first sight”. I was in love with her in the very first day and I felt that the vice-versa is also happening. I was 19 then and she was 18. Now I am 35 and she is my wife. Still now we love each other as those days when we were floating on the sea of first love.

As I said previously that life is not a very smooth way to walk. If life gifts you a beautiful presentation in a particular crossing of this way, it will surely take something off from you for the cost of that presentation. I got love of my life, but lost my best friend.

I was too busy in my new world to notice that I was not paying much attention to Sneha. At first a little rift grew between us and as time passed this rift increased. When I became aware about this, it was too late. After graduation, Sneha went abroad for higher education without saying me ‘Good Bye’. I knew about it from her parents when I met them in a family get together after three months Sneha left the country. A sharp feeling of pain covered me instantly. In that sleepless night I realised that it was my fault. I was so busy in my life and dating with my love that I even not met her three months long. It is very unusual for a best friend.

After that the struggle of the settlement in the life began. The whole Sneha-episode went down in the dark chamber of my mind. After her fathers retirement Sneha’s parents went to live in Delhi where she had settled down her life as a University professor. Sneha did not met me, even did not bother to contact with me after college life. She left her best friend without saying a “Good Bye”.

Last week I went to a wedding party of one of my college friend. After 10 long years I met Sneha. She has changed enough to recognise as my once best friend. She has developed her personality as per her profession. At first she started to avoid me in the party. But I forced her to speak with me. I asked about her husband. She threw a strange expression to me which was neither pity nor sorrow, and with a fake smile she told me that she is happy to be a single woman.

It was uncomfortable for me. She is not Sneha, who was my best friend. That expression with mixed emotion is totally unknown to me. That fake smile to me is quite unnatural for her.

After the party, when I was returning home, I asked her, “Why were you left me without saying a Good Bye?” She did not answer me. Though there was no need to say anything. We were out of the marriage hall going to the car parking zone. It was a moonlit night. In the bright moonlight I saw tears rolling down her cheeks. Instantly the whole matter was clear to me as that shining cloudless sky with full moon.

Her painful expression is killing me still now. She was sensible about all of my emotions and mental states. But I even tot tried to understand her feelings properly. But it was not my fault. I had not same feeling for her. But now, I am puzzled with my feelings. What ever I used to think, everything is going wrong. My whole world has been changed. I am no more able to think straight. I don’t know what I have to do. I don’t want to lose my wife and son. I don’t want to lose my best friend as well.
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